I had planned to write a Mother's Day post but ended up having a busy weekend hanging out with the kids so, I am just now getting the time. A week later, well, late is better than never! Besides, when you're a mom (I think you ladies can all agree) everyday is Mother's Day!
Now I'm no expert, but I can share my personal thoughts and views based on my experience and if anyone can take anything from that, that's pretty awesome!
Since I've had my daughter, I have felt a tremendous amount of pressure to be the best mom I can and give her the absolute best example of a woman. All the sudden I felt it was my duty as a mom to learn to knit, sew, bake pies, be a know-it-all crafty type, have the 4-1-1 on how to properly bleach whites, and give an inspirational speech at the drop of a hat. I do like crafts and I pin a lot of pie recipes (that has to count for something), and yes I am wearing a "Twerk It" Sweater in the above photo. Hahaha.
Well, now I have three other children (my boyfriend's children) who I am also setting an example for. (Wow, layin' that pressure on thick!) Having two little girls who watch me, imitate me, look up to me, and look to me for guidance definitely makes me much more aware of myself and the image I portray. Considering you are always leading by example as a mother, I have thought about the Top 10 Things I Want To Teach My Daughters. And if they can take anything from me, I would like it to be this...
10 Things I Want To Teach My Daughters:
1. The Art of Being Soft and Strong.
Now, this is not easy. And it's something I continue to work at every single day. As a woman, you need to be soft. You need to be loving, kind, thoughtful, and understanding. Because love is the only thing in this world that can counter hate. I want you to always know that. Being soft doesn't make you weak. Having the ability to be compassionate and feel for others is a gift. I want you to know that. At the same time, as a woman, you need to be strong. People will often try to take your kindness for weakness and take advantage of you. If I could wish anything for you it would be for you to be loving and compassionate, to have the ability to stand on your own two feet, and to not take anyone's shit. (Just like mama!)
2. Please Practice Humility.
Confidence as a woman is a must but, arrogance is fugly (Yes, I used fugly) and a big no-no. I want you to succeed, do your best, be great, be beautiful, be brilliant but, I also want you to be humble. Arrogance is loud and ugly. Humbleness is a beautiful thing. Let your actions speak for themselves.
3. Have Character And Do Not Be Afraid To Show It!
Character is in your actions. Doing the right thing when no one is looking. Doing the right thing when it may not necessarily benefit you. Being kind to people because it's right not because you want to get something out of it. The most beautiful women are the ones with true character. And the most beautiful women without it, have nothing to offer but their looks. I want you to know beauty is not all in how you look, dress, or present yourself. Beauty is in the essence of who you are and how gracefully you deal with others and situations.
4. Always Have Respect For Yourselves.
Now this one ties into character. As a woman, you are constantly being pulled in one direction and the other. What society thinks you should do, what your friends think you should do, what guys your age think you should do. I do not want you to ever fall victim to this kind of thinking. If someone doesn't like you for who you are, let them go. If someone wants you to do something you're not ready to do, see-ya. Respect goes a lot further than attention will ever get you. I want you to know this. I want you to know you are special, you are rare, you are beautiful, and you are one of a kind. You should never allow anyone to treat you as anything less. And you should never treat yourself as anything less. (And if someone treats you as less you walk away or tell me and I will kick their ass!)
5. Do Not Chase A Guy!
Now, this is for the future. If a guy is really interested in you and for the right reasons, he will pursue you. If he doesn't, he's not worth your time. Sure, he may be cute and popular and charming but, in the end, that's not actually important when it comes to a relationship. You do not have to text, call, chase, (or in my worst nightmares) stalk him! Hahaha. I want you to know that you deserve the fairytale! A guy who adores and respects you and he will come along. But, you can't force a guy who just isn't him, to be him. And, you shouldn't want to. I will refer you both back to #4 Having Respect For Yourselves.
6. People Are More Important Than Things.
Nothing in life is promised. I learned this at a young age. I want you to understand that material things are not what's important in life. What's important is spending time with the people we love because that time is always limited. Material things and possessions lose their luster but old photographs, memories, and the time we spend with the people we love are priceless.
7. Do Not Be Scared Of Being Alone.
This is a big one. Some times in life you will be alone. Be okay with that. Be okay with just focusing on yourself and bettering yourself. Being alone gives you the option of being picky. Don't run into the arms of someone who isn't right for you in the fear of being alone. Because being in the wrong company can feel a million times lonlier than being alone. There is strength in being alone. Wait for the person worth compromising your alone time for.
8. Accept That The Only Thing In Life You Have Control Over Is Yourself.
You cannot control the world, you cannot control others, and some times you have absolutely no control over events that take place. What you do have control over is yourself, who you choose to be around, what activities you choose to partake in, and your reaction to things. The sooner you accept this, the happier and easier your life will be.
9. Time Is Limited, Do What YOU Love!
Don't live your lives for others. Don't live your lives to appease me even. Do what you love, and don't wait. Do as much of what you love as you can. And take tons of pictures and send them to me!
10. Do Not Try To Fit In!
You are fine just the way you are. You are special and unique. There is only one you. Celebrate it! You offer your own strengths, opinions, talents, and unique viewpoint. Do not lose that in trying to be like everyone else. You were born to be an individual. And remember what can be found everywhere is common, but what is unique and rarely found is sought after.
And remember that I love you and I always will!